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Song Info:

"N Apostrophe T" Was Released In 2000. This Song Was Featured On "The Rest Of Tom Lehrer" And "The Remains Of Tom Lehrer". This Song Was Also Shown On The Electric Company.

Lyrics:

(Scene: Outside the cave of a very grouchy hermit (H). A very sweet child (C) coming along)

(C): Isn't it a lovely day?

(H): No, it isn't!

(C): Could you come outside and play?

(H): No, I couldn't!

(C): Did you ever take a hike?

(H): No, I didn't!

(C): How'd you like to ride my bike?

(H): Frankly, I wouldn't!

(C): Isn't, couldn't, didn't, wouldn't Is that all you can say?

(H): Isn't, couldn't, didn't, wouldn't - Yes, now go away The sweetest sound to me It stands for "not" I like it a lot It's spelled "n"-apostrophe-"t"

(C): Have you ever tried to smile?

(H): No, I haven't!

(C): Won't you try it for a while?

(H): No, I won't!

(C): Are there games to play in there?

(H): No, there aren't!

(C): Then why d'you like to stay in there?

(H): Frankly, I don't!

(C): Haven't, won't, aren't, don't Is that all you can say?

(H): Haven't, won't, aren't, don't - And I said: "Go away:" Grouches all agree We get a glow From saying "no" With "n"-apostrophe-"t"

(C): Do you talk to anyone? 

(H): (wistfully) No, I don't! 

(C): Come on out and have some fun 

(H): (hesitantly) No, I couldn't! 

(C): Can't you even tell me why? 

(H): (apologetically) No, I can't! 

(C): Will it kill you just to try? 

(H): (wanting to) Well, I shouldn't . . 

(C): Don't, couldn't, can't, shouldn't Now, try it once my way

(C): Do? (H): Do . . 

(C): Could?

(H): Could…

(C): Can?

(H): Can . . 

(C): Should

(H): Should! Hey, that feels okay!

(C): So come along with me . . 

(H): I'll give it a try And say goodbye To "n"-apostrophe

(C): "N"-apostrophe

(C,H):"N"-apostrophe-"t"!

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